I am trying to move forward, doing my best, trying my best to move forward my life. but the darkness keeps on pulling me, keeping me. I don’t know. when will i get better? I want to be somebody else, why is life so unfair? i’m depressed, I have no will, or there is, I don’t know, its only about 1/10, my other self wants to get better but the other is telling me to quit. Please help me,
I am so sad, i always think about getting transmigrated to other world, i asked god if he really is true, can he that for me, I promise ill live my life, but I know its just fantasy, I cant escape this life, its so unfair, why is other kids rich even though they didn’t do anything, Its their parents money you know, but they can get everything they want, how about being poor, your parents are the one to blame but you know you cant blame them, its just making me sad, I want to study you know, go to places that I want, eat food, study the course I want, I cant help but to feel jealous too, I always compare myslef to others but I cant help it, its making me sick, I’m the one sabotaging myself and i cant do anything to stop it.
I cant afford professional help for i am poor, and I don’t want to bother my parents anymore. I know I’m the only one to blame for putting my life into this situation, even if there really is something keeping me in the darkness, its my fault for listening to it. i don’t want to talk to anyone, but i just want somebody to help me.
I am getting better last 2 days, i thought wow I’m finally getting over it, and then the next day i don’t know, its the same old usual again. pls help me, I’m so useless even killing myself scares me, haha i want to be a lawyer you know, its just so sad.
FROM…. Jane