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Dear... Milo

Love you but i don’t. I don’t know what love is and i don’t know if that makes my love more or less valid. I don’t know if this is platonic or romantic or whatever the fuck else. I don’t know if I’ve ever loved anyone. I probably have but how do I tell? We’re only 13, so incredibly young that everything is just so confusing. I worry age won’t fix that. 

I don’t think it matters right now. You’re always so self conscious and never believe in compliments and i wish i could help you but i don’t know how, and i don’t think i have the courage. You’re the funniest person I know but i worry about you endlessly. 

Sometimes you say something extremely personal and sad and seem so casual about it that i can’t possibly figure out how to react. It can be so hard to tell when you are and aren’t being serious and i hate that. I hate that i hate anything about you. We’re going to different highschools in only a few months and I’ve always been bad at staying in touch with anyone I’ve been separated from. 

I can’t think of anything else to say except that i wrote this letter differently than my usual writing style and i don’t know what that means

FROM…. Someone you maybe still consider a friend

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